San Francisco is one of the more liberated and (not to mention) lubricated cities of America. When I first moved here I thought you could drink openly on the street. I found out the SFPD disagrees, the hard way. Though I can't condone it, I would like to lay out some guidelines to help you better enjoy publicly drinking in San Francisco.
1: Brown bags are yesterday's news. Brown bags are not-so-bright arrows that point to concealed beers. Cops know what is in that bag. Instead, I prefer Solo cups. They are so obvious, they're not. Believe me no cop is gonna come up and ask to taste what is in the cup. Two of my favorite wines for Solo drinking are the Etz Gruner Veltliner and Orsolani Erbaluce Liters. Both of the wines are well-balanced white wines with luscious acidity, fresh floral aromas and a great mineral tang.
Another alternative to the brown bag is the travel coffee mug. Perfect for the bus ride home after work. Just rinse that mug out, grab a beer at the corner store, and you've got your own private happy hour! No one's going to say..."Oh, hey look, that guy's got some froth in his mustache, it must be a delicious beer he's got in that travel mug." They're going to assume that that froth on your upper lip is from that latte you got at blue bottle. So, sip away and smile as you watch all of the other crotchety commuters on muni, and contemplate the idea that they might all be grinning too if only they had gotten a cup to go.
2: Make your drinks at home and take them on the road. Dust off your Klean Kanteen and add your favorite mix drink. One of the trendiest drinks of the season is the John Daly, named after the drunken golfer John "DUI" Daly. The lazy man's way is mix Sweet Tea Vodka with some lemonade. BORING!! If you want a hangover or you just wanna impress the bros at the frat go with Firefly or Seagrams. I prefer to do it the real deal way. I mix Hangar One straight vodka, Fentimens botanically brewed lemonade and add Guayaki Yerba Mate. The Hangar One is smooth and delicous, the Fentimens is the best lemonade on the market and Guayaki adds a natural caffeine kick in the pants. Chill this down and take it on the run.
3: Drink like a Pro, no JV stuff around here. You don't have to be an alcoholic to drink like a pro either. You just need a brain and you need to use it. No one likes a sloppy drunk. You know who you are, you get two drinks in you, you wanna tell the world how your drunk and you don't care. No one cares! In fact we care so little we want you to go away. I can't count the amount of times on a Friday or Saturday some 22 year old kid comes in blotto and has to tell me how he is "sooo hammered." Well, idiot, now I can't sell you that 30 pack of bud lite. Pull yourself together. Don't tell the person who you are buying alcohol from that you are drunk. Why? Because as much as I would love to be a part of the good-times I can't know you are drunk. It is illegal for me to serve drunk people. So keep it cool and the party can continue. Act a fool and party over.
I hope this has opened your eyes to the party possibilities of San Francisco. So as always be safe and above all else have a good time.
I wrote this post listening to the music of Wes Montgomery.
Brilliant.
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